Wednesday, October 25, 2006
i'm dying in envy...
i've missed a call from a friend in college, curious that i was i returned the call and found out that he just got what probably a number of you, reading right now, so beggingly asked from Him... i did!... i still do! i'm lying when i told him that i 'm happy for him, well actually i'm not, i am happy for him... but i'm dying in envy! and it had left me asking and sinning more & more now that i'm even blogging about it! waaaAAaAaHhHhHhhhHhHhH!!! life isn't fair! it never really was! i know that. but it hit me big time, this time!
i envy him for the courage & wisdom he endured all the drudging 2 straight years of his life.. i was close, i endured a year and a half! the only difference is that he finally got his prayers, i have yet to... iN tiMe... I WILL! i envy him that he only had to wait 2 years.. i envy him that his hard work all paid off.. he has nothing more to worry about.. i envy him that he can go home tonight sleep all the days of his life and wake up having the same vibrant feeling he has before sleeping.. i envy him and his girlfriend, who also is a friend of mine by the way, for both getting their hard prayed wish.. i envy him in every aspect i can think of right now! and it's bad. its a sin. it's what most of you call envy. i'm sinning. and i can't help it. i don't get envy... not for a long time. and i am feeling so bad right now that my 3hour sleep is starting to pull my heavy head back into my dungeon.. hehe. and/but i can't get back to sleep. i'm too envious right now. too sad? or too happy? i cannot tell.
i'm envious.. i'm glad. i'm sad. i can't even say congratulations for getting that CPA license. it's unfair!
can you feel the beat?
1:18 PM
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Thursday, October 05, 2006
zZzZzZzZzzZZz
Its 12:06 in the morning and I’m trying, really hard, to stay awake until my exam is given not later than 6am today. Tasked to study a VAT Flowchart, I feel the need to momentarily relax my deadbeat wits. Hardly any thoughts though run wild as I fight back the urge to lay down and let slumber take me in; my 2- year old cousin got sick needing us to bring him to the hospital @ 9 Saturday evening and stay there until today, Wednesday afternoon. Bronchi- pneumonia is the doctor’s official findings; my buddy Aiai’s birthday is coming up; the shoes I’m wearing right now are in ruins and I barely have the time or the money to buy a new one, something more hardwearing; contemplating on the things to buy this weekend; the coffee, free as it is here does not help this dilemma of mine to stay wide awake and I’m thinking if I can afford to stay late in the office today to attend the 2nd session of the dance class for an hour, an hour after office work since I live in relative distance from here. Thank you thoughts for keeping me half-awake. Back to reading…
can you feel the beat?
12:06 AM
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